Legacy of a wreck.

July 8th 2012, at around 7.15 pm I was knocked of my road bike while out training for forthcoming triathlons. Over a year on and my bike has been restored to a ride worthy state. New forks, wheels, brakes, shifters, cables, bottle cages and handle bars. The bike is totally ready for action. I have even lent it to a close friend for her to use during her own first ever Triathlon. Problem is..... am I ready?

The 12th of July was a long time ago. So what's wrong?

I recently went for a psychological evaluation for part of my insurance/compensation claim. I have since received a copy of the doctor's report. It made for some very interesting reading. Some people have asked me if I "hammed it up" for the session with the doctor? I can tell you now. There is no way a reasonable person would be able to pull anything over the eyes of these trained professionals. The report was as much about my body language, eye contact and attitude, than anything else. He was very thorough in his questioning, bringing up some things from my medical records which caught me of guard. For example.

Pretty funny eh? As you can imagine. This took me by surprise BIG TIME! Apparently this was to see if I had any underlying anger management issues.... I don't.... I DON'T!!!!! ;-)

I  was also asked about my emotional state. I have always been more on the positive side. I mean I am very thankful that I didn't get seriously injured or worse. I have not had any real breakdowns. The closest i've come to "losing it" was the first time I saw this video to the Rudimental track- Waiting all night. It's opening sequence includes footage of a bike accident. The guy was a bit of a plum but no one deserves that.....

So what's wrong again? It turns out I have developed a form of Specific Phobia which is related to riding my road bike. I can ride my single speed (fixie), my hybrid and my commuter bikes, but I have issues with riding my race bike at pace. I have tried using it to ride to work, but I am still very nervous. I also seem to make excuses to avoid going riding. Too hot, too cold, looks like rain and there may be ice out. I can't pretend to understand this fully. I just know that my fear is irrational and unfounded. 

I hope to get back to it soon... tomorrow?

The price of injury

Went to the doctors today. This was so they could check and evaluate my injuries from my accident in July. Took longer than I anticipated but hopefully will be worth while. Have been told  that the scars will remain and not fade much more due to the nature of the cuts.
The injuries have all but healed. The scars still itch like a bastard. My knees only give me discomfort when squatting. I think most of the damage is psychological. I still am quite nervous on the road when cycling and my confidence has been smashed. Really not sure how I will react if I ever get back on the saddle.

Still just hanging there in my garage the "Dirty Bike Carcass"

Next step is to wait and see what/how much the solicitor recommends putting in a claim for. Then we wait.
Still unsure what to do with any compensation too. The option of getting a new bike is nice but the second option of investing in a new business opportunity for 2013 also appeals.
Guess I will have to wait and see.  

Weekend break in Hopton

I have just got back from a weekend away with the family. We spent Friday, Saturday and Sunday at Haven holiday village in Hopton. The resort itself was really nice. Quite literally, on the beach. We are already planning a mini Triathlon camp there for next year :-) 

The food at Haven was what I expected! Traditional menu of bought-in classics in the restaurant. Pizza (Papa Johns) everywhere. Burger bars, candy floss, all the normal unhealthy resort stuff. We only ate in the restaurant once. This was to celebrate Abby (my wife's) bingo win. £361....Ker-Ching!!! 

For a starter, I went for the whole baked Camembert. Followed by a Gourmet burger thing. Both pretty darned tasty.

The puddings were a bit of a disaster, but I won't go in to that too much. The kitchen had run out of Whipping cream, chocolate and vanilla ice cream. This meant the sundae's that the kids had ordered were made with clotted cream. Not nice. Also the fruit salad which my daughter was served was barely worthy of being called a fruit salad. Lemon tart was nice. 

Now, I seem to have gained a few pounds over the last few weeks (now 13st 8lb usually 12st11) I'm still recovering from my hernia op. Will start back with a diet of some sort soon.....Maybe!

That is all! :-)

Not a natural winner??? (blog post)

This year I have won a Zipvit Tri suit, a £50 wiggle voucher and some Haribo goodies I even managed a first place in a marathon team relay at a recent event.

What is going on???

 On a personal level, it’s not winning but almost. I recently applied for a college course. As part of the application process I was asked to sit an online literacy and numeracy test. Anyone who reads this, or previous posts will know that my literacy skills are not the best. I mean, you should see how many red squiggles are on this page now, before I hit the spell-check button! Anyway, I spent two to three days studying/refreshing my math and English skills, and after a stressful few hours I passed the tests with higher scores than I expected. That feeling of accomplishment is awesome.

 I know life balances out. This is one of my firm beliefs. You just have to view it with perspective. To say “you win some, you lose some” may feel like a cop out, but really, that is it!

I used to wonder why I never won anything, though the reality is that I have been a winner all my life. I don’t mean for that to sound as wanky as it does. What I mean is, I have a good life, my wife is my best friend, my kids stress me out sometimes, but they are great kids. I have had employment all of my working life, my parents are enjoying their retirements. I have a roof over my head (admittedly, a massive never-ending mortgage). All these things and more add up to, in my mind, a win.

 I may bitch on Twitter and Facebook about my running/cycling/triathlon training. I’ll complain about not racing due to this hernia thing. But that is not ALL my life. I have perspective.

 I have said before, I am looking forward to 2012. I can’t wait to see what it brings personally, academically and *sportingly. 

 

....touch wood! :-)

 

*is that a word?